Hatchling
by Fallen Ark Angel
Summary: Because there's nothing more that a baby dragon likes than cake. Nothing. Well, maybe her daddy. - One-shot, set in the Last Month realm.


Hatchling

It was probably due to the fact that he was just about to come out of his deep slumber that he even heard the noise to begin with. A cry. A scream, really. Screaming. Of a baby. His baby. His baby was screaming.

Laxus bolted up in bed in a panic, nearly tripping over his feet as he went.

"Lana!" he yelled as he ran, following the sounds of her cries all the way down the stairs. He felt like he was still dreaming, honestly. "Where are you?"

In the kitchen, as he found out. And the second he got down there to her, he rushed to go pick her up.

"Lana!"

"Daddy," she sobbed though there was some surprise in her tone. "Doggies ate my cake!"

Huh?

"Uh, Laxus?" That was Mirajane, from over at the kitchen table. "Do you not know we have guests or-"

"What?" Slowly, the man moved to set the girl back down on the ground. "I-"

"If I knew I was getting entertainment with my drink," he heard Cana quip who was sitting there as well, "I'dda brought a few bills to slip ya, Laxus."

Lana was unconcerned with her father's state off undress as he walked around in his boxers all the time. That's how he slept when it was hot. No biggie for her.

But those doggies eating her cake? Unacceptable.

"I…I thought that Lana was hurt," Laxus said slowly, glancing over at the table. His wife was there, staring at him, as well as the guild's resident drunk, his sister-in-law, and the celestial mage. Great. "I woke up and heard her crying and-"

"More cake!" Lana was pointing then at where her last piece handed ended up, which happened to be under a plate on the floor, both of her brothers, as Mira called the pooches, lapping up at it. "Daddy."

He figured, as he glanced down at her, that the little girl had been given the plate of cake by her mother as the women all had their own slice, over at the table, but for whatever reason, Lana was walking around while she was eating it and somehow managed to drop it. Or the dogs knocked her over to get it. Either way, the result was the same.

"She does let out some loud whines," Lucy offered up as she tried hard not to stare at Laxus and embarrass him further. "I think she has the loudest cry I've ever heard."

Oh, she did. It was something that Lana took pride in.

"More cake," the three year old kept insisting, tilting her hair back to stare at her father. "Daddy. Bad Raijin! Bad Tenjin! My cake!"

"Stop yelling, Lana," Mirajane sighed as she went back to taking a sip from her cup of coffee. She was having some sort of get-together with the other women, it looked like. Since so much of her free time was spent at home, dealing with Lana, she had those more and more. "I told you to just sit in Lisanna's lap and eat your cake. You're the one that went to feed the dogs."

"Wait," the man complained. "You gave them the cake, Lana?"

"No!" Glaring up at him then, she said, "I give doggies a little."

"She was feeding them some of the cake and they knocked her over," Lisanna sighed. "And honestly, Laxus, are you just going to stand there like that or-"

"You don't sound too bothered," Lucy mumbled to her. The other woman only shrugged.

"I lived here," she told her softly. "I'm glad he's actually fully clothed."

"What?"

Growling, Laxus looked over there. "It was one time, Lisanna!"

"He walks around naked when he thinks nobody's home," she kept up, Cana snickering as Lucy finally spared a glance at the slayer. "It's not a pretty sight."

More growling. "It's a wonderful sight, you ungrateful-"

"Laxus." Mira sent him a glare then, though he wasn't sure if it was for the way that he was speaking to her baby sister or the fact that he was disturbing her gathering. "Nothing's wrong. You can go back to bed now. Lana's fine. She's just upset."

That was true enough. The toddler was very upset. Usually she loved her dogs, but at the moment? Not one bit.

Mira was wrong about one thing though. Laxus couldn't go back to bed. Not at all. His adrenaline, while going down, had been going full throttle. It would take a bit for him to calm fully down once more.

"Come on." Laxus just reached down to pick up his white haired child, much to her annoyance. "Lana. Let's-"

"No," she complained, still pointing at where Tenjin and Raijin were pretty much done with her dessert at that point. "Cake!"

"Later," Laxus hissed, carrying her off. "You embarrassed me, you know. Making me come out here all undressed and-"

That made Lana stop wiggling against his grasp as she took to giggling instead. "You nakie."

"I am not naked! I clearly am wearing box-"

"You nakie."

"Stop saying that!"

Over at the table, Mirajane only shook her head as they disappeared from the room though Cana had a big laugh over the whole thing. Lisanna though went back to stabbing at her own piece of cake while Lucy spoke.

"He seemed to be in a good mood," she remarked slowly. Mira found herself giggling at that for some reason.

"Yeah," she sighed slowly, shaking her head slightly. "He was just gone, you know, on that super long job. He's always like this around Lana though, no matter how long he's gone."

Cana, the only one drinking anything heavy, slung back a glass of wine. "You and Laxus still don't make sense, but that makes it more than worth it."

Lucy giggled too. "I think it's sweet that he's that way with Lana. He's so…different. Not all brooding and stuff. It's pretty nice. Creepy, but nice."

"That's the best kind of nice," Mira agreed with a nod and a grin. Lisanna got up then though, when the dogs started barking at one another over something. They'd finished the cake, completely licked the area clean, but she figured she'd go wipe the floor down with a rag anyways. "Laxus just loves Lana so much. They do everything together."

That was true as, at the moment, Laxus was having his three year old help him decide what to wear for the day.

"No, Lana," he sighed as she told him what she thought he should put on. "I'm not wearing that."

"Swimmin'," she told him. "Daddy."

"It's not a good day to go swimming," he argued. "So no. I'm not putting on my trunks."

"Trunks!" She tossed her hands up in the air and jumped at the word. "Trunks! Swimmin'!"

"No."

Lana loved his swimming shorts. The main ones he wore had a very nice looking design on them.

And going swimming wasn't half bad either.

"Pick something else," her father was saying to which the child whined some, but did go with him to glance in the closet and pick out a shirt.

Once they had a somewhat decent outfit picked out (he wasn't planning on leaving the house that day anyhow), Laxus left her sitting on the bed as he went into the bathroom to wash off quickly and change. When he got back to her, he fell into the bed eliciting a giggle from the toddler who immediately moved to snuggle up to him.

"No swimmin'?"

"No swimming," he told her as she moved to climb on his chest, the slayer falling onto his back to accommodate this. "I just got home yesterday, hatchling."

She giggled at the moniker. She really liked it, even though she didn't know what it meant. Really, she liked anything Laxus called her. Or any time he was giving her attention. Which, honestly, was all the time they were together.

"Cake."

"We'll get cake when all those women leave," he sighed as she pressed her knees into his chest, staring down at him with her deep blue eyes. "We'll get tons of cake. And hey! That's my cake. The demon made it for me coming home. The heck are they doing eating my cake?"

"My cake," she repeated. Laxus though misunderstood and nodded.

"Well, yeah, your cake. Your cake and my cake. Our cake."

"Ow cake!"

"Right." Then, with a frown, Laxus moved to sit up, the toddler giggling as she tumbled into his lap. "That's our cake. Not theirs. They shouldn't get a piece of our cake."

"Cake!"

Nodding, he said, "I get that cake 'cause I leave my blood and tears out on jobs, hard jobs, giving up time with you and the demon, to bring home jewels. And you get it because, poor you, you have to go weeks without me. Months."

"Ow cake."

"That's right, hatchling." He moved to get out of bed, holding her in his arms. "And we're gonna go get it."

"Yay!"

"Shhh."

"Yay," she whispered softer then, giggling when he kissed her head.

Laxus and Lana always found things to do during the day. She was getting to the point that, while she still needed naps, they were becoming less frequent and didn't last as long. That left them with valuable hours to fill with all sorts of things. And, at the moment, it would be retrieving their cake.

The women were talking about something stupid when he came into the kitchen, Bickslow by the sound of it. Lisanna had recently gotten back together with the seith after a (brief) breakup and man, Laxus was glad he was off on a job when all that was going on. He just knew she and Mirajane would have annoyed him about the whole thing. Not to mention Bickslow who had quite the problem with drinking when something overly stressed him. And breaking up with Lisanna did that and more.

Sigh. They were so caught up in Lisanna talking (well, Mira and Lucy were, Cana was more concerned with refilling her wine glass) that they didn't notice him at first. Until, that is, until he came over to the kitchen table and, shifting Lana to one arm, moved to pick up the covered cake dish with his other hand.

Mira batted at him.

"What are you doing, Laxus?" she sighed as Lisanna made a face at him, annoyed that he was interrupting her story. "Huh?"

"It's my cake," he reasoned. "So-"

"Ow cake," Lana agreed.

"Right. And we're going to take it now, upstairs, to finish it. So if you ladies would kindly-"

Mira batted at him again. "Go away."

"Demon-"

"Go."

"No. I-"

"If you want cake, Laxus,' Lisanna complained, "go get a chair from the dinning room and sit down. Otherwise, go away. I'm trying to tell a story here, you know."

"Yeah, I know. I just don't care."

"Laxus," Mira complained. "Just-"

"She and Bickslow are too idiotic to be without one another," he said simply, trying again to get the cake. Mira shut down that attempt too. "They can't be with anyone else. Listening to either of them say otherwise is annoying. You're all annoying. Now give me my-"

"No."

"Just give him the cake, Mirajane," Cana said, waving a hand at the man. "It tastes horrible with my wine."

"I think that it's supposed to," Lucy told her with a slight grin. "I mean-"

"Cana agrees with me. That's one." Laxus looked to Lucy then. "Blondie, tell Mira to give me the cake."

"W-What?"

"Laxus, you're ruining my party," Mirajane complained. "Now-"

He winked at the other woman then. "Come on, Lucy. Tell her. Tell her how I deserve the cake. You-"

"Are you seriously trying to charm other women in front of me and our daughter?" Mira asked, glancing up at him. "Laxus?"

"What? No. I just-"

"Seemed like it."

"Cana," he complained. "You were on my side!"

Lisanna only huffed. "If it will get him out of here, Mira, give him the cake. I don't want anymore anyways."

"Ow cake," Lana insisted.

"There. Majority rule." Laxus sat the little girl down then to pick it up. "Blondie, Cana, and Lisanna are with me. I win."

"I don't remember say anything close to that," Lucy pointed out. When she got a glare for that remark, she said quickly, "But have at it if you want. I'm full."

And, with two hands free then, Laxus easily beat Mirajane out as he picked the cake up. "Ha."

Glaring at him, Mirajane said, "Just go. You big baby."

"How am I a baby? It's my cake. My."

"Ow."

"Our cake," he corrected at Lana's insistence. "Ours. Not yours."

"I made it!"

"Yeah, well, you gave it to me, so-"

"Laxus Dreyar-"

"Still mine. Last name or not."

"You-"

"Could you guys knock it off?" Cana complained. "You're already married. You don't gotta keep up this disgusting flirting. It's ruining my wine."

"And my story," Lisanna added. "This is important-"

"For the last time," Laxus growled. "No one cares what you and Bickslow do. You were warned not to get with him before and now you're stuck. Deal with it."

"Like Mira's dealing with you?"

"You little-"

"Go, Laxus." Mira gave in then. "Take the cake. Before you ruin something else."

Taking his win in stride, Laxus turned to walk away.

"Don't eat that cake in our bed though. And get forks! And plates! Laxus-"

"Bah." He glanced down at Lana who grinned up at him, following right along. "Come on, hatchling, let's-"

"Wait, what?" Lucy finally broke then, staring down the slayer. "What did you just say?"

"Hatchling," Lisanna answered for him, knowing he wouldn't. "It's what he calls Lana."

That made him turn back to glare at them. He'd won the cake, fine, but he would not stand for teasing, which he was certain they were about to start.

"It's like a baby lizard or something," Mira sighed, idly staring down into her coffee cup and waiting for her husband to leave. She really did want to get back to having a nice, quiet party. Even if they did have to talk about stupid Bickslow, it beat Laxus misbehaving and being his usual dramatic (though he pretended to hate every second of it) self.

"The hell would you call a kid that for?" Cana asked loudly. "Laxus?"

"I don't answer to-"

"You know," Mira kept up, wanting the conversation to be over. She'd fawned over the nickname before. Many times. At the moment, it was the last thing she wanted to talk about. "Like a baby dragon."

For a moment, none of them said anything. Lisanna too had been aware of this and only rolled her eyes. Then Cana started laughing and Lucy grinned.

"Aw, Laxus."

"Shut up."

"You're so cute."

"I said to shut up."

"Who knew you were such a catch?" the celestial mage kept up. "You were right, Mira, he does have a sweet side."

"That's not even half of what he-"

"Demon!" Laxus barked. "Knock it off. And Lana, come on. We're not welcome here."

"Oh, you definitely are," Cana insisted. "Come sit down. Let's talk about-"

"But," Lucy kept up. "I don't quite get it. You're a Dragon Slayer, which means eventually, you'd have to kill her. Right?"

He blinked. Then he narrowed his eyes at her. "You're dead for this, you stupid little-"

"And there's the Laxus we all know and love," Cana sighed.

"Laxus!" That time Mirajane wasn't feigning anger. Her eyes were dark. "Get out. Now. You-"

"She just completely ruined… Arg! This is why I don't talk to you stupid women. This guild is full of stupid women!"

Mirajane's dogs, who had been out of the room, no doubt being their usual mischievous selves and probably peeing somewhere or ripping up one of Laxus' shirts, came rushing back into the kitchen, yapping from all the excitement.

"No," Laxus hissed as they then changed their path and tried to follow him back out of the kitchen. "Leave me alone you damn mutts! Lana! Come on. We're going to eat our cake. Somewhere away from all these jerks."

"He's quite the drama queen these days," Cana remarked as Lucy only sunk down in her chair.

"He was kidding, right?" Lucy glanced around. "Mirajane?"

Instead of responding to either off those things, the she-demon only looked to her sister and, after a long breath, she said, "You were saying?"

Laxus though only led his daughter and dogs (the latter against his will) up the stairs and to his bedroom. Lana was worn out by the time they got there and was happy to have that cake to revive her. Her father wasn't feeling it much at that point though and only sat there, on the bed, as Lana used her hands to dig right into the cake, the dogs jumping up onto the bed for a few bites of it themselves.

"I can't believe it," Laxus mumbled as the toddler and dogs just gobbled up what was left of the cake. It wasn't much, honestly. "That woman ruined it, Lana. She ruined it. How can I call you my little baby dragon now that she's likened it to me killing you? Ludicrous. What am I supposed to call you now? Huh? Not hatchling."

"Habaling," she attempted to say, mouth full of cake and coated in frosting. "Daddy."

"I mean why would she do that?" Then he growled. "Those stupid women."

"Haba…caling," she tried again. "Daddy."

"Hmmm?" Glancing down at her, he said, "What's that? Are you telling me that you don't care? That I can call you that anyways? Because you know that even if you did turn into a massive dragon that was going to destroy all of Magnolia I would never raise a hand to you? Because I love you and you're my baby and I could never slay you?"

Not at all. She was questioning why exactly he was letting those filthy doggies eat even more of her cake and how come he wasn't having some himself.

But…what he said sounded nice. As nice as it could, anyhow, to someone who had a very basic understanding of the human language and disposition.

"Yes," she told him with a nod. She almost always answered his questions that way. Then, scooping up some more of the cake from the pan, Lana held it out to him. "Eat cake, Daddy?"

Laxus grinned…until he noticed that it was covered in slobber from the dogs. "No thanks, baby. In fact, I think you've had enough too. I really made a bad call. Eating with the dogs isn't good. And look at the crumbs you guys got everywhere!"

Lana only took to licking her hands and arms and everywhere else there was frosting. Her doggies helped her out, making the toddler giggle.

Sighing, Laxus shook his head. "You're gonna need a bath, hatchling."

"Daddy." Finished with the doggies and her tummy aching already from all the sweets, she just went to cuddle up to the man. "Ow cake."

He could only smile. Despite the fact the demon was going to kill him for getting the bed and baby dirty, letting the dogs and baby eat so much cake, and, of course, ruining her little get-together, Laxus leaned down to kiss his baby's head.

"And just think," he whispered. "It's only noon. The day has just begun. We still have so much more to do today."

Not Lana. In fact, after eating all that cake, her day was kinda complete. She got to play with Aunt Lisanna and hang out with her mother's friends. Not to mention her daddy was home. Yeah, it was a good time to call it quits. Before she did something bad, like made a mess with her finger paints or pulled one of the dogs' tails.

"What have you done?"

Or let Mommy find the bed, dogs, and her covered in frosting.

"Maybe," Laxus whispered as Mirajane, who'd come up from her party to check on them, berated him, "today wasn't the best of days."

Glancing down at his baby, he could only shake his head.

Who was he kidding? Every day with Lana was great. His little hatchling. She made being yelled at worth it.

…Sorta.

"You know, demon," he told her later that day after her friends were all gone and she a little bit less ticked at him. "You should be happy with me."

"Oh?" She hardly glanced away from the stove where she was making dinner.

Nodding from the kitchen table, he said, "Look at me. I'm a way better guy than I've ever been. Did I get frosting on the bed? Yes."

"And the dogs and the baby."

"Did I insult Lisanna? Yes."

"And Lucy and Cana."

"But," he said, looking down at the toddler who had fallen asleep in his lap, "I also showed just how much I love my little dragon. Doesn't that count for something?"

Yes. Of course. Just watching him with their daughter made her feel all giddy inside and served as a reminder of the chance she'd taken on her dragon and the benefits she was reaping then. She loved her life with her husband, daughter, dogs, and big house.

But at the moment she wasn't biting.

"No."

Laxus just grinned down at Lana though. It was worth it. Totally worth it.

* * *

 **All the stupid words we have in the world and we don't have one for a baby dragon. I never thought about it, but it seems like something that some fantasy book/author would have come up with and got one to catch on by now. Oh well. Poor Lana will just have to suffer with hatchling.**


End file.
